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Meet My Gorgeous Friend, Shakira Patterson!

Shakira is a mom of two and a military wife to her husband, who is currently deployed overseas. Her daughters are 3 and 1, you guys. Blows my mind and makes me feel so grateful for my husband and the fact that he can come home whenever I need him to. I know I speak for everyone listening and reading when I express my sincere thanks for the service of Shakira’s husband, as well as hers. The spouses that are running their homes and keeping it together through incredibly hard and stressful times are also heroes. So thank you to all the men and women of our armed services. You are seen and appreciated.

With all of that going on, Shakira decided to start her own business, Occasions by Shakira. She has a lifestyle blog for moms, helping them celebrate and make memories with their family, and also does party planning! 

In this episode, Shakira is sharing her advice for those of us walking through a hard season. She talks about where she finds the strength to show up, celebrate, and be present in the moment with her girls, even when she doesn’t feel like it. This is an episode we can all relate to. We all have struggles and hardships, but celebrations and making memories are littles ways we can bring joy to a tough time. Shakira is doing this and her determination and bravery are incredibly inspiring to me,

SHOW SPONSOR

I know party planning can be super overwhelming. It’s time consuming, expensive, and can lead to a lot of insecurities…not to mention the HOURS it takes to plan and prep it all! I’m here to help a sister out. In addition to hosting the Memories in Moments podcast, I also create party planning guides and checklists for themed parties. These are designed with one goal in mind: help a busy mom save time, stress, and money so she actually enjoys the party she’s hosting. I’ve thought (and found!) every little detail you need to bring your themed party to life, given you links to purchase it all, and put it all in one convenient download you can access anywhere. No more Pinterest and no more wandering the aisles of Target. Now you’ve got a clear plan of attack that’ll result in a beautiful party ending in tons of cherished memories with your loved ones. It’s that easy! Shop party plans and let’s get celebrating!

How to Involve the Whole Family

Shakira’s husband is currently deployed, but she still wants him to feel included, and for their girls to have special memories of their father celebrating with them. She shares some of her favorite ways to include him in their daily moments and celebrations!

Daddy Dolls

Genius idea! Both girls have a Daddy Doll, which is a plush doll that has their daddy’s picture on it. They can carry this whenever they need to, give daddy snuggles at night, etc. I thought this was the coolest thing. Great job on a brilliant business, Daddy Dolls! This would be a wonderful gift for a kiddo who has a parent currently serving or a parent that travels often. 

Bedtime Stories

Dad also recorded himself reading some of their favorite bedtime stories. She saves these for special occasions, or really tough moments, when she needs to pull something together. 

Planning Dates

What are we going to do when…? Having your kids plan ahead and share what they are most looking forward to doing when dad/mom comes home, or when someone gets better, etc. is a fun way to think a little more positively about the situation you’re in. I loved that Shakira’s daughter wants to get Skittles and go to Lowe’s with her daddy. How adorable is that? And notice that it’s a totally mundane, everyday thing. It’s not some big trip, or elaborate party. It’s simple and something she used to do and misses. It’s the little moments she wants, and probably what you want back about your life before this hard season as well.

 Where Does the Motivation Come From?

I was a bit thrown during the interview to be honest. I am someone that relies so heavily on her partner and when he’s gone, I’m a wreck. Trying to put myself in Shakira’s shoes was virtually impossible for me. It made me sad, frustrated, anxious, and grateful. I was trying to process what she was saying and also interview her and listen to her story, and I struggled. We both got a little emotional for a minute because her daily life can be hard. It made me appreciate what I have (and often take for granted) so much.

Shakira was very honest when she said she doesn’t always feel motivated to celebrate or show up. Christmas without her husband was hard. It would have been real easy to skip it this year and brush over it. But she put her mom hat on and powered through. That takes strength, my friend. When he is home, she is very intentional about their time together. They make little moments big and appreciate the together time because they don’t know how long it will be for. This mindset is something we could all learn from.

Husband For the WIN

Before he left, Shakira’s husband wrote her letters. I mean…come on. Open on Christmas, This is for when you’re having a hard day, this is for a special day when you can’t call me. Is that not the most thoughtful thing? Good job, hubby. What a treasured gift for anyone needing some encouragement. I was thinking about how special this would be for a group of girlfriends to do for a friend struggling, or a family member as well. I loved this special way to connect when when you can’t physically be in someone’s presence. 

Advice to Other Mamas That May Be in a Hard Season

Sometimes showing up for these little moments or celebrations is one of the constants in the life of a military family. They can be moved around a lot, schedules up in the air, etc. When it’s just their time together, make it intentional. Have the movie night with a fun snack, and do it regularly. Every Friday night they can look forward to some family movie time. It’s a routine and a constant. 

Shakira has a great tip for dealing with anxiety too. She forces herself to stop in the anxious moment and name 3 things she is grateful for about the moment. For example, she was in the ER alone with her little one, and she was grateful for her health insurance and a hard working husband. It helped calm her down and focus on getting through something tough and focus on the end game. I love this tip and it’s something I try to do often too!

 

Occasion Kits 

Shakira has come up with these darling play date in a box kits. She’s teamed up with other moms who make cookies or craft kits, and put together a full activity for you to do with your kids. Everything is done for you, with all the supplies, and you get to just play and enjoy the memories being made! How fun is that! Below is a picture of her Valentine’s Day box, which she had cookie decorating and a fun Valentine’s craft. Currently (at the time of this recording 2/20/19) she is selling these locally, but has goals to ship in the near future!

She wanted to come up with a way for a busy mom to be able to do some little easy activity with her kids, without the planning and prep. So if you can get your hands on a box (they sell out fast!) you can enjoy a super fun memory making activity with your kids, already done for you with all the supplies you need. Easy! I also love that these kits are giving a little bit of joy to someone that may be going through a tough time. It’s a way to show up and have something to look forward to for you and your loved ones.

Learn more about the Occasion Kits on her Instagram!

Go connect with Shakira and say Hi!

Website: Occasions by Shakira

Instagram

Facebook

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Head on over to my free Facebook group, Memories in Moments Insiders! There you’ll find additional resources to support each episode, more information on guests and how you can connect with them, visual and video tutorials, and best of all, connection as we navigate parenting and making memories together!

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SHOW SPONSOR

I know party planning can be super overwhelming. It’s time consuming, expensive, and can lead to a lot of insecurities…not to mention the HOURS it takes to plan and prep it all! I’m here to help a sister out. In addition to hosting the Memories in Moments podcast, I also create party planning guides and checklists for themed parties. These are designed with one goal in mind: help a busy mom save time, stress, and money so she actually enjoys the party she’s hosting. I’ve thought (and found!) every little detail you need to bring your themed party to life, given you links to purchase it all, and put it all in one convenient download you can access anywhere. No more Pinterest and no more wandering the aisles of Target. Now you’ve got a clear plan of attack that’ll result in a beautiful party ending in tons of cherished memories with your loved ones. It’s that easy! Shop party plans and let’s get celebrating!

3 Comments

  1. Vanessa Moyer

    Hello my very intelligent and loving daughter. I so enjoyed your Podcast. You are an Awesome daughter, I’m Blessed to be your Mother. Very very well spoken and enlightening. Raegan&Zarie have the best Mother in the world. I love your little family. Thank you Mark!!!❤️Thank you for being you!

    Reply
    • Allison Carter

      I love this so much! Shakira has so much strength and grace. I’m in awe of her and am so lucky that I get to call her a friend. You raised a beautiful daughter, Vanessa!

      Reply
  2. Maria

    Shakira this is an awesome blog! I am so proud of you and your drive to help other moms with dad’s on deployment. You are truly a beautiful gem. Stay strong and keep motivated ❤️

    Reply

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