Episode 70: Are you Actually Happy? with Dr. Lindsay Weisner

Memories in Moments

January 28, 2020

What the heck is happiness? How do we know if we are actually happy? Is it different for everyone? I had SO many questions when it comes to this topic because it’s something I struggle with a lot. I believe I am a happy person, naturally positive, but where does that come from? And how can I teach this to my kids. Psychologist, Dr. Lindsay Weisner is here to talk about it all on today’s show!

Listen below or head on over to iTunesSpotify, or Stitcher!

Meet my Keeping it Real Happiness Friend, Dr. Lindsay!

Long Island, mom of 2 and psychologist, Dr. Lindsay Weisner, is on the show today to share her experience and research when it comes to happiness. What the heck is happiness? How do we know if we are actually happy? Is it different for everyone? I had SO many questions when it comes to this topic because it’s something I struggle with a lot. I believe I am a happy person, naturally positive, but where does that come from? And how can I teach this to my kids. We talk about it all on today’s podcast!

Happiness is something I wonder about because there are SO many instances where I feel like I “should” be happy, but am not sure if I really am or not. That holds a lot of shame. I remember when Hudson was born and everyone kept asking me how happy I was. “Aren’t you so happy?” over and over. And yes I was…but I also was really unhappy in a lot of ways and the shame and guilt over that clouded that potential of happiness I think. Does that make sense? Have you felt this before?

The moments we are told to be happy or expected to be are often instances where we aren’t.

Dr. Lindsay says this boils down a lot to expectations. The situation or outcome doesn’t meet our expectations so we feel unhappy about this. That was a huge eye opener for me, especially as someone that usually as high and unrealistic expectations!

Don’t forget- happiness takes work!

The Book: 10 Steps to Finding Happy

Realistic, manageable, relatable. I loved this book. These expectations and what we expect out of happiness get tweaks and to me, is very freeing. I don’t know that I could define happiness for me, but I can identify the moments in my life that make me the happiest.

Bedtime reading with my kids

Trying a new food and a new restaurant

Traveling somewhere new

Shared experiences with my family and friends

Those are the times where I am at my happiest self.

What are your moments? Comment below, I’d love to hear them!

Happiness Tweaks

Trash your routine and try something new!

Find your people- your ACTUAL people that make you feel good and safe and figure out who you don’t need and get rid of them

How Does This Affect Our Kids?

How can we teach our kids about happiness and what that means/feels? I feel like we want them to be happy so much. We want our kids to be happy, but we also want them to learn from unhappiness, which is a hugely important skill.

Our kids aren’t meant to be happy all the time. They are going to be met with a rude awakening once they leave us if so. If our kids are unhappy, it does NOT mean we are doing something wrong. We are trying our best, learning from experiences and trying to do better next time. Sad kids every once in awhile are normal and okay. You are doing great, mama.

Follow the journey of Lindsay’s book with the hashtag #tenstepsendthestigma!

CONNECT WITH Lindsay AND SAY HI!

Follow Lindsay on Instagram

Preorder the Book: 10 Steps to Finding Happy

Podcast: Psych Shrink Mom

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